Skip to main content

Put a Speed Limit on Your Rate of Speech





  
     Haveyoueverheardsomeonetalksoquicklythatitseemedeverythingtheysaidranalltogetherinonesentence?  Much like that statement, it was hard to listen to what was said.  You could barely follow the path of their conversation because much of what was spoken seemed jumbled and unclear.  For those of us who are fast talkers, having to slow down is as exciting as driving behind someone who's going slow in the fast lane.  We're a a bit annoyed that not everyone can appreciate the speed we do, and we feel that having to put on brakes frequently is like having to drive behind a postal truck.  We're doing a lot of starting and stopping, but we're not necessarily getting anywhere.  Nonetheless, fast talkers must be cognizant that our rate of speech can get in the way of our clarity of speech.  We have to remember that even though the thoughts are coming rapid-fire, we don't have to get them all out in 0-60 seconds.  We have to give the other person an opportunity to process what we just said.  Some people take longer than others so we have to take people's listening habits into consideration.
     Fast talkers falsely believe that we can "listen fast" too.  We need to think about that again.  Just like we tend to fumble over our words when we speak too quickly, we fumble when we listen too quickly.  We think we heard something one way, but it was actually meant another.  That's because the way it was presented was so rushed that we sped up our hearing to catch up with all that was being said.  But even though we were "hearing faster", that didn't mean our brains had caught up with our ears.  We heard words, but their meaning was lost on us.  We jumped to conclusions and judgment believing we knew what the other person was talking about even though they hadn't finished explaining.  Now...if you have a fast talker listening to a fast talker, there's so much speed flowing between the two that there's nobody slowing down enough to process any of this instant exchange.  Fast talkers sound breathless, rushed, frazzled, and a teeny bit out of control.  Almost as if they can't stop themselves.  Well, pump your brakes because here's some help for those of us who feel like we're on the Lowe's Motor Speedway of communication.
     I was a fast talker for a long time until I joined my local Toastmasters club.  If you're unfamiliar with Toastmasters International, it's a wonderful speaking organization that helps anyone who wants to be a better presenter.  I had been speaking publicly for years before I joined Toastmasters, but I hadn't realized all of the bad habits I'd picked up along the way.  Being a member of Toastmasters helped me to get the much needed feedback I desired so I could become a sharper presenter.  I was evaluated on numerous speeches throughout the years when I was a dedicated member, and I received constructive and valuable coaching from my fellow Toastmasters.  One of the most useful pieces of advice was "slow down when you speak".  I hadn't realized that I was a fast talker until it was brought to my attention.  Now that I'm aware, I make adjustments when I'm giving speeches, leading meetings, conducting small group coaching or in any situation where I have to share information that others need to hear.
     If you've been told you talk too fast, keep that information top of mind.  Then put a speed limit on your rapid pace.  Check out a local Toastmasters club to create new speaking habits.  And practice communicating with the same caution to speed that you use on the highway.  The slow listeners will thank you for it.
    

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How to Talk About Race: A Panel Discussion

When Your "Jokes" Get You in Trouble

         Everybody loves a good laugh. We feel better when we hear something funny and our anxiety or pain is eased because humor has come as a balm in a tense day. Laughter is beneficial to our emotional and physical health. Well-placed humor works easily in a lot of ways when we are telling stories, but can also come at a huge cost. If we joke about a topic that is sensitive to many, and we do it in a public forum where our intent can be misconstrued by the audience, then we can create a firestorm of frustration for ourselves and them.      A recent example of a humor faux pas involves rapper T.I. and his comments regarding how he checks for his daughter's virginity.  He claimed in a podcast that when his 18-year-old daughter goes to the gynecologist, he tells the doctor to check her hymen to make sure it's still intact--an indication that she is still a virgin. Though this is not an accurate test of virginity, T.I. says he told the doctor: "...just check the hymen

What Humility Sounds Like in Leadership

     To be in a position of leadership is usually associated with being in a position of power.  And though the power is real and necessary, it must be balanced with the willingness to respond humbly in situations that warrant it.  It's time we eliminate the misunderstanding that humility is weakness.  In fact, to take a position of humility takes a lot of restraint and sacrifice.  This is difficult for many to do.  Therefore, the weakness comes in yielding to arrogance and dominance because it is easy to do.  The strength is found in backing away from selfish desires and allowing someone else to be successful.      Not sure what humility looks like in leadership?  Consider these examples: The boss who gives credit to his employee for an idea that allowed the entire department to shine. The manager who was clearly wrong when making a decision on a project and admits that mistake when the project fails. The supervisor who yields her opinion to someone else on the team so tha